One of our mantras is, “You get what you tolerate”. Put another way, you act based on what you expect not what you want.
You want your kids to behave in a certain way. But you don’t set appropriate expectations. Same with your colleagues or employees.
This plays out in your personal life too. You want a fantastic relationship, a dream job, a great life. But through past experiences you set you bar low and expect little. Which is exactly what you get.
And as Psychologist Jennice Vilhauer points out in this TED talk, when you do get the opportunity you’d always dreamed of, you’re likely to blow it.
But there is a solution. You’ll have to watch the talk to find out. Believe me, it’s worth it.