Do you sabotage yourself? In life, work or business?
Look, we all do it to some extent. Full of good intentions we still avoid doing things we know would be good for us. Like eating better, getting fitter or in business doing things we find unpleasant like selling.
So what’s going on in our heads? (Full transcript below)
Full Transcript
Do you sabotage yourself? In life, work or business?
Look, we all do it to some extent. Full of good intentions we still avoid doing things we know would be good for us. Like eating better, getting fitter or in business doing things we find unpleasant like selling.
So what’s going on in our heads?
It comes down to a cost – benefit equation, where a real or imagined pain versus a payoff or gain comes into play
If the perceived cost is greater than the payoff, you won’t start.
And even if you do start, if your motivation isn’t strong enough to pull you through the inevitable struggle, you’ll quit at the first hurdle.
Gym memberships are a classic example. Most people who take out memberships go twice. Ever!
That initial burst of enthusiasm doesn’t last and it’s easier to stay in your comfort zone, be it sitting in front of the idiot box eating junk food.
As business mentors we see exactly the same issue with clients who know they need to get out of their comfort zones if they’re to grow their businesses.
This means not hiding behind their computers on social media and actually talking to prospects and customers. Making difficult decisions that have long term benefits and payoffs.
So what makes some people push through to success while others flounder?
It comes down to mindset. How clear your vision is and how badly you want the result. And then having a strategy that pulls you through the inevitable obstacles that life will test you with.
There’s an apt saying that the enemy of great is good.
So if you’re in your comfort zone and life is okay, what’s going to pull you through?
And how do you handle the inevitable resistance that will come?
Phone prospecting is a classic example even if you’ve met them at a function.
You’d like to find out more about them, talk about your business and explore working together.
But you find yourself holding back thinking they won’t welcome the call, feel you’re being pushy, or simply not be interested. In turn you might feel humiliated, embarrassed or even devastated. So you avoid making the call.
But what would happen if you made the call and they became a client? Isn’t that a far bigger payoff? And as you’ll be helping them achieve what they want, a win for both parties?
The key is to recognise when avoidance behaviour is happening and then choose to do something about it. Anything else is to go through life, possibly unintentionally self-sabotaging your success.
So the next time you find yourself avoiding something which could potentially help you grow ask yourself the following questions and be honest with your answers.
- What am I doing to avoid this?
- How does that feel?
- What is the belief that is driving this avoidance?
- Is that belief really true and is it working for me and what’s the cost allowing this to control my decisions?
- What’s the payoff of attaching to this belief and is the payoff real and is it worth it?
Write your answers down and you may well shift and take a different action. Of course, the alternative is do nothing and stay in your comfort zone.
And if you get stuck, I’m more than happy to spend a few minutes with you on the phone to get you going.
So give me a yell – till next time this is Rashid Kotwal.
